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| gottaluvdavillains Fri 10/5/2007 5:03p | I think I have figured out the teenage years (DS18, DS16)... Time seems to go by so fast during those first 13 years - full of so many firsts and lasts... The teenage years seem to go on forever as they are the time your child seems to know everything and will test every limit known to mankind (okay maybe not every one - but sometimes it seems like it) Sometimes a teen will hate you (or so they think) and other times they will love and admire you... The best thing I think I have done in raising my teens (I know they are boys) is give them enough room to make the mistakes they need to make to grow - but to be there when they fall (and DS18 had fallen hard) and let them know each time they fall you will be there if to not to catch them, then to help them up...That you are not there to put them down or to tell them "i told you so" but just to love them and care for them as they heal... We all know if we could go back and be a teen now - knowing what we know now - we could do it so much better - but it is not for us to relive our teens through our kids - but to help guide them through these toughest of years... With love the teen years will definately hold some of your best and probably most of your worst memories of your childs life!!
Okay back to friend - I chickened out to a point about calling her and sent her an email to start with - I broke down all the money and how it is owed and why - It's more than I realized once I started adding it up - I also told her I needed it right away or hubby would cancell my upcoming trips (he wouldn't do that to us - but I am a woose and used him as an excuse to put my cyber foot down...) I hope this works and I can be done with it!!
Have a great weekend to all - Tink where are you today...
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| mater4 Fri 10/5/2007 5:19p | Villans, I agree you should print up a bill with copies of receipts if you can. Then you can set up a payment plan with intrest.If she ignores it send her a bill every month until she pays. I am sorry to hear that this is still making you sad and DD can't seem to escape the trip of doom at school. Try to have a good weekend and have a mudslide for me. When is your second trip to DL? ( the one after your halloween trip)
Mollysmom, Glad your DD is 13 before mine and villians. We can seek you for advice. My DD has 5 years to go as she will be 8 in Dec. I hope she never outgrows DL because she has no choice as long as she lives with me.:) |
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| Tinkerbell819 Fri 10/5/2007 7:21p | Hey girls! I don't know if anyone will be checking in over the weekend, but I wanted to at least say how proud I am of Villains sending the email to her travel companion a/k/a trip wrecker! That was a good idea to mention that you may have to cancel your upcoming trips due to insufficient finds, hopefully that tactic will work and fast! I was thinking today about some of the trips I've taken where someone else tagged along or met us there and proceeded to ruin everything. I was trying to remember how long it took to get over it. I realized I never got over it. lol Of course, over time, the rage isn't as strong. :) One was a WDW trip and it was almost 10 years ago. We went for the holidays around the beginning of Dec. and my SIL, who hates Disney and only lives a few hours from WDW, met us there and stayed with us for 2 nights. I had bought tix for all of us for Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party. Now you know we have the 2 boys w/Autism and this was before cell phones and walkie talkies, so things are always a bit crazy to begin with. Well, SIL was sneaking beer in the back of her kid's stroller to get herself through this awful ordeal of going to a Disney park and I am so excited about how wonderful it's going to be. We got inside almost as the parade was starting. I had wanted to see the WDW Christmas parade practically my entire life and talked about it to the boys all the time. I lined them up to see it and SIL says, "I'm getting out of here, see ya". "I'll meet up with you later". Well, DH says he'll take the older boys with her and they can go on rides and my youngest son and I can watch the parade and meet them later. So, the youngest decides he doesn't want to miss any rides and wants to go with them. Now, they are all leaving me alone to watch the parade and say they'll meet me at this bench on Main St. at 9:00. The parade was beautiful and that was the end of my good time, b/c the rest of the night I spent looking for them. No one ever showed up at the bench. I went to City Hall about 6 times asking if anyone left a message for me to meet them somewhere else. I think the party was over at 1 am. I never saw them on Main St. leaving in the crowd, so I figured I'd go to the car to see if they were there. They weren't. I didn't have the keys, so I sat down by the car and it started to rain. This was about 1:45 am. Now, I didn't get to experience any of the fun stuff with my kids, walked around all night looking for them and now I'm sitting in the parking lot in the rain, and for all of this I spent about $250 b/c I treated everyone. I think I fell asleep in the parking lot. When they all showed up, they were apologizing and blaming my oldest son, Matt for everything. (One of the autistic ones.) I didn't speak to any of them for quite a while. Come to think of it, maybe that's the reason I switched to DL for all of my Disney trips now, so SIL can't hook up with us! lol
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| Tinkerbell819 Fri 10/5/2007 7:29p | Happy 13th Birthday, to MM's DD!!!!! |
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| gottaluvdavillains Fri 10/5/2007 8:55p | I would have just cried...I did on one trip and that was the turn around for DS18 - It was his Sophomore year and the choir was going on it's first trip to DL to compete. I was so excited for him and all his friends and was so looking forward to spending this "adult" time with him. The girls in the choir (of course there are many more of them than the boys) are so happy I am there because they know I am the go to Disney person. The whole way down and everywhere we went they all wanted to hang out with me - well DS being just 16 at the time didn't realize this was a good thing and made a big fuss to me about it - Then he DITCHED me in the park - Now a planned trip alone is fun - but as you know from being ditched at WDW is a whole different experience. When his friends ran into me later and realized what he did - boy did they give it to him... It was at that point he realize - even if I wasn't the "hot" mom or the "cool" mom - I was the "disney" mom and that was okay, even to a bunch of teens!!
I think it is harder when it is a family member that does this to us - you can't just dump them!! I use to go only with my SIL and her kids since I was nervous about traveling alone with just my kids and DH is mr no disney man...There were plenty of times she made the trip almost unbearable and one time we even got in a shouting match in DCA. After she had been questioned about her large 5 year old in the back of the stroller trying to pass him off as a 3 year old - he is slightly autistic(she still won't admit it but his school has done all the paperwork and put him in all the special programs with my BIL's help) and was worse when he was younger as when asked his age he just screamed in there faces - a common thing he would do back then, along with the arm flapping. My #DS asked his cousin if she had an extra map - since he didn't stop for one while she was still being questioned! SIL flew off the handle and told him her daughter wasn't his servant or something... I blew a gasket and took off - I figured we drove down in my minivan so she could figure it out herself! About an hour later she found me and apoligized to my son (profusly) and me and we went on our way - but to this day I don't completely trust her with my kids!
NOw I take my kids sometimes just one or two at a time and sometimes all of them and we just have a great time...I will be going with SIL in two weeks - but I am only taking 2 of my kids and with that we have 5 kids (9,10,11,11,12) and they still love doing it together and I can deal with it for a couple days - because I know what to expect - with friend I had no idea!!
I hope you have a great weekend - I hear mr mudslide calling me + friday night lights starts in a minute!! |
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| MOLLYSMOM Mon 10/8/2007 9:40a | Mornin'!!!
villains...good move on e-mailing your friend. I think that was a good choice. You can say all that you need to, you don't get interrupted, and you can organize your thoughts better. So, has she answered you yet?
tink and villains...you two have Disney vacation stories from hell! It always astounds me how people can get cranky and snippy at the park, or mess up someone else's good time. We have met up with family or friends on our trips, but only for PART of our vacation. While we've never had major issues with anyone, I WILL say that our best times in the park are when it's just the 3 of us.
Made it through our first weekend with a teenager. No bruises, blood or broken bones. I have gotten lots of advice here on LP the past few days that I will try to remember and take to heart.
mater4...if I clued you in on my next few years with DD and gave you advise, you would miss out on all the fun. So...if I have to learn the hard way, I think you should, too. :) |
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| gottaluvdavillains Mon 10/8/2007 11:16a | Well I am so glad to hear that the first weekend was a success...How are you doing with your big suprise for next weekend?? You must be ready to explode with excitement...
I do agree Tink and I have experienced the worse part of Disneyland (friends and family that just don't get it!!). But that is the good thing about going back - you still have the next time to replace the bad memories...And we always learn a lesson - it's just sad when you have to face the fact that not everyone is who you think they are!!
No word yet from HER... I think I will resend the email and then print it and stick it in the mailbox. HER works in the classroom on fridays and DD said HER didn't say anything to DD and just kind of nodded when DD said goodbye to HER when class was over.
Hey tink hope you had a good weekend too... |
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| MOLLYSMOM Mon 10/8/2007 2:48p | It is very strange, but I am not overly excited about leaving this thursday. To tell the truth, I have actually forgotten all about it a time or two.
I get absolutely batty when I have a DL trip in the works, but anything else doesn't really faze me much.
Don't get me wrong, I am looking foreward to our "Girls Gone Wild" weekend, but I'm not frothing at the mouth or suffering from insomnia like with DL.
What is very strange for me, is that this is the first trip that DD and I have taken without DH since we brought him home. It doesn't seem "right" for whatever reason to go off without him.
I know we're going to have a blast, and I know that once we get over the weirdness of being without DH, we'll probably plan a "girl trip" every year.
Well, it will be very interesting to see how long it takes for HER to respond to your e-mail...if she even does. We are all going to be sitting on the edge of our seats waiting for her response. I have a feeling that this will be good. No Matter what, you be a tough cookie and stick up for yourself, and stand your ground.
Hey, if she DOES pay you back, you could probably squeak out yet ANOTHER trip to DL. Cool...she owes you a fun trip anyway. |
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| gottaluvdavillains Mon 10/8/2007 3:31p | I think your right about the once you get there part - it was hard for me on my first few trips - first without DH and then when I started leaving kids at home too...
I think you should try and plan a girls trip each year from now on - I know other who started this when their girls were very young and are still doing it and we are all in our early 40's now...I think especially with her entering her teen years if you have a set trip each year - say it's always the second weekend in Oct, or presidents day etc - no matter what's going on each others lives or going on between mother and daughter (I am sure you will never have a problem with her) you stop and just go away together. I think that would be the best gift all of you could give to each other!! I am sure DH is happy you gals will be out of the house for a couple days... It will be a roosters den instead of a hen house!!!! :D |
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| MOLLYSMOM Mon 10/8/2007 4:12p | I think that's a great idea...girl vacation each year. It doesn't have to be somewhere far away or expensive...just somewhere for the 2 of us to hang out and giggle. I never did things like that with my mom. There were 4 of us, and well, there wasn't the time or money back then for us to be able to do things like that. I don't recall ever taking a family vacation. That's why this past trip to DL was such a big deal...it was our FIRST family trip. I wish we lived within striking distance of DL like you do. That would be the most fun place to visit for our girl weekends. Airfare is a killer...I can fly to Orlando cheaper than I can to Anaheim!
Actually, poor DH won't be gettin' the house to himself. He is headed over to Bellingham to help his friend move back here. His best friend moved over there about 18 months ago. He got a job offer back here that he couldn't pass up on, so back home he comes. He and DH have been best friends for almost 20 years, so this will be great for the both of them. It will also save me tons on the phone bill. These two guys talk on the phone TWICE a day!! I tease them about being worse than old women.
Our house will be invaded by hunters friday night...opening day is saturday...which is one of the reasons DD and I are flying home saturday.
Your next trip is comming up soon. How nice that will be for you... you'll get over this past fiasco. It sounds like you will have a terrific time with the 5 kids...they are at a super fun age to take to DL. Like you said...you know what to expect with SIL, so all should go well. It CANNOT be ANYTHING like this past trip. |