World Events
Topic: Science proves Conservatives happier than Liberals

#	Author	Message
21	Dabob2 Tue 5/13/2008 2:46p	Creative people tend to be liberal. Not all, of course, but a solid majority. It was ever thus, and probably always will be.
22	Kar2oonMan Tue 5/13/2008 3:01p	Conservatives tend to wear pinchy shoes and collars that are at least 2 sizes too small. This makes them short-tempered and irritable. Their pained, clenched expression can be misread as smiling from a distance, explaining why they seem happier than liberals. Liberals tend to wear more flowing, loose-fitting clothing. Unfortunately, this can lead to chaffing, which makes them short-tempered and irritable. If you've ever suffered a bad bout of chaffing, there's no way to mask the pained expression, resulting in them coming out on the lower end of the happiness meter in surveys such as this. Moderates, meanwhile, dress stylishly and in well-fitting clothing. This allows them the patience to tolerate the anger from the left and right. 50% of their days are pretty good, and 50% of them are lousy days. So they wind up not scoring high enough to appear happiest, nor low enough to seem unhappiest.
23	Sport Goofy Tue 5/13/2008 3:25p	Given all the conservative talking heads that seem to easily dismiss scientific claims about all the things they disagree with, isn't it a bit of an oxymoron for conservatives to turn to the scientific community to prove how happy they are? I'll buy the happiness research when the conservatives stop denying the science that describes global warming.
24	mele Tue 5/13/2008 4:25p	Ha, DAR and 2oony! :-)
25	DAR Wed 5/14/2008 6:55a	Here's one. Conservatives form their opinions through talk radio. Liberals form their opinions through bumper stickers.
26	Kar2oonMan Wed 5/14/2008 1:20p	Liberals go to a sald bar and eat mostly salad and soup. Conservatives go to a salad bar and eat mostly pasta and tapioca. Afterwards, both claim to be stuffed but admit to having "just enough room" for a dish of soft serve ice cream. (Conservatives will have vanilla or chocolate, and top it with chocolate sauce and nuts, while liberals will opt for vanilla and chocolate mixed, topped with caramel and colorful sprinkles.)
27	Kar2oonMan Wed 5/14/2008 1:21p	Cats are mostly conservatives. Dogs are generally liberal. The exceptions are cats in bookstores, which are always liberals. And police dogs, which are always conservative.
28	Kar2oonMan Wed 5/14/2008 1:21p	Commercial jets are conservative. Helicopters are liberal.
29	Kar2oonMan Wed 5/14/2008 1:24p	Hardware stores are conservative. Craft stores are liberal.
30	DAR Wed 5/14/2008 1:26p	LOL

All times are Pacific Time (US)

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