World Events
Topic: Coming Soon... # 18!

#	Author	Message
21	EighthDwarf Mon 5/12/2008 7:06a	<<That really begs the question though...how many is "too many"?>> Well, from a scientific standpoint, 2 or less would be perfect (0 population growth). But I think there could be a test to see if you have too many: 1. Do you ever ask one of your older children to watch one of your younger children? 2. Are you able to attend one child's activity without missing out on another? 3. Do you talk to each child every day about there day? 4. Do you know all you children's friends and their parents? 5. Does the number of children you have prevent you from doing fun family activities (such as travelling, going out to dinner, etc.)? 6. Are you able to pay for college for all of your children at the best college they can get accepted to? 7. Do you ever say to your kids, "Well, if I buy that for you then I will also have to buy it for _______"? And on and on and on.
22	X-san Mon 5/12/2008 7:38a	You had me until number 5 (questionable...as it takes into account the "net worth" of a family as a factor which I don't really buy into...some small families can probably afford elaborate vacations but does that make them "better", or "happier"? I don't think so...there are pros and cons on that front to be sure), then number 6 was just silly since many families can't even swing ONE tuition, particularly at the "best" college they can get accepted to since some are incredibly overpriced now, and number 7 again is just, well, that's the way it goes in some families (and maybe it's okay for some kids to do without sometimes...just maybe). But numbers 1 through 4 are very cool as a measuring stick, I would say. :)
23	X-san Mon 5/12/2008 7:42a	***Are you able to pay for college for all of your children at the best college they can get accepted to?*** Not to keep going on this unnecessarily, but is this now a prerequisite for a parent? That they be wealthy enough to afford the finest college for any and all of their kids? Well, if so I don't think it's realistic. What's wrong with other colleges and higher education options?
24	mickeymeg Mon 5/12/2008 8:14a	"Do you ever ask one of your older children to watch one of your younger children?" I am the oldest of 3, the younger two are twins. I was expected by about grade 4 or so to be responsible for looking after my younger siblings after school until my Mum got home from work. At the time I did feel that sometimes I would rather not have had this responsibility, but looking back now I am glad I did. I learned a lot about responsibility and have a good relationship and many memories of this time with my siblings that I would not have if they were sent to day care after school. The point I am trying to make is that I really don't think that just because an older sibling is given responsibility, within reason, that includes taking care of a younger sibling there are 'too many' kids. In many many cultures (I would guess the majority of the world) it would be considered the norm for older siblings to help out. Just my two cents. -Meg
25	imadisneygal Mon 5/12/2008 11:06a	Personally I think there's a big difference between having an older, teenage sibling watching younger kids for, say, a few hours while the parents are running errands or having dinner and those same teenagers being responsible for every waking moment of their younger siblings including waking, feeding, bathing, clothing, etc. all day every day. I used to stay at home occasionally with my younger sister once I was a teen and I did not feel as though it was an undue burden. Again, the difference comes into play when the older child is essentially responsible for the younger ones all day every day. As to missing activities for one child to be at the other one's activities, this already has happened to me with only two boys. We had to split the attending (my husband and I) in order to be both places. It's likely to happen to any family with more than one child at least once. The only way to avoid it is to have an only child, and no job that might prevent you from missing any possible activities. I'm not sure there's an objective qualification for "too many kids." But I know it when I see it...
26	barboy Mon 5/12/2008 5:40p	"Are you able to pay for college for all of your children at the best college they can get accepted to?' I find that absurd; you are kidding right? Well I guess not.
27	barboy Mon 5/12/2008 5:42p	" Do you ever say to your kids, "Well, if I buy that for you then I will also have to buy it for _______"?" I question your #7 too.
28	imadisneygal Mon 5/12/2008 6:00p	I only have two kids and I hardly ever feel the need to make things "even" with purchases. They each get what they need, but they do not always get the same or equivalent items.
29	barboy Mon 5/12/2008 8:53p	Now that I look again the whole list except for #5 looks dubious. I say #5 is reasonable.
30	X-san Mon 5/12/2008 10:26p	That's funny. I thought the first four were very good measuring sticks. Number five, again, really just comes down to net worth and how "important" things like going out to dinner are. Some families would be content to never go out, or can't afford to, but enjoy a lovingly prepared dinner every night in the company of their loved ones.

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